kellye's Cancer Blog
September 20, 2008
| Paracentesis and Birthday | Views: 915 |
Looking for any information about what to expect if paracentesis no longer works. Has anyone ever been told they were no longer an option for it? We are not sure what to expect Monday but fear the worse if no fluid is able to be drawn off. She is no longer seeing an oncologist. Her doctor is the one at the hospice facility and she only sees him when she goes in for the drainage. The nurse is the one that comes to the house regularly and keeps him updated. On another note; Barbara’s 68 birthday is coming up on Sept. 19. She will be 68 years old. She is not able to take very many people for very long at a time but we would love to make this as special as possible for her. Does anyone have any ideas for gifts? We have wondered about a “quick” drop in party, like a drop in bridal shower or something. Maybe set up from 2 to 3 but let everyone know that they should only stay a couple of minutes. I know they would love to see her and she would like to see them but I don’t want to wear her out. She had several groups that had been having monthly luncheons at the Red Lobster over the past 6 months so she could see everyone and not have so many visitors on a daily basis. She felt that by doing that she could get it all over with quickly and see 10 or 15 in an hour as opposed to 10 or 15 an hour at a time individually. I cannot think of anything to give her since she is in the process of giving away everything now. As always, thanks to all of you for your continued support and I wish the best to you all. Kellye
Thanks for your support -
Kellye,
I always love everything that Weezie says. She is phenomenal. I also love the idea of a drop in birthday. It is so important to be appreciated and loved, but sometimes it is hard to take all of the socializing. When I have been very sick I have appreciated books on tape, movies, and music. My niece bought me a new iPod that played all of the above. I love it. I just rent movies on itunes for $3.99. My friends have gotten me gift cards to use on itunes and I can rent whatever I want.
What I really wanted was for my husband to take up a collection for a recliner chair as sometimes I am too weak or in too much pain to go upstairs. The couch isn’t that comfortable and I need my head elevated. He never did it and I was so disappointed. I finally bought one for myself. It has been wonderful (I used my life insurance figuring it was a good use for it). Please, anyone who is terminal (a year or less to live) and if you have life insurance, check to see of you have early disbursement on a portion of your policy. That is how I am paying my way (bills, medical expenses) now that I can’t work, and how I have paid my son’s and my daughter’s tuition. It is also how I am affording my “Bucket List”. I have 2 policies. One gave me 75% the other 50% each in one big check. WIthout that we would have lost our home and the kids wouldn’t be in college. It is an amazing benefit and such a blessing to the whole family.
Another nice gift is the gift of time like reading a book or magazine article or the newspaper to Barbara, if that is something that she would enjoy. Sitting looking through old family photos and having her tell stories about them is a wonderful way for her to enjoy memories and a way to share family lore and pass on stories. If she has the strength her stories can be recorded for posterity.
Kellye, you are very special. I admire you and I feel the depth of your caring. Don’t doubt that you are doing enough, for indeed you are so giving and loving I can’t imagine anyone caring more than you do. Sending prayers and love to all of you. Gaile
Kellye,
I think your idea of the party where people only stay a few minutes would be wonderful. Also, I think flowers, a potted plant or a beautiful new gown and robe in her favorite color would be something I would suggest. Also, if she could tolerate it, her favorite food would be nice. If it were me, that favorite food would be something chocolate. These suggestions are just some things I would like. They might not work for her.
As for what comes next, the hospice nurse should be able to tell you. If he/she doesn’t know, they could find out for you from the doctor or you can call the doctor yourself and ask him what comes next. They are all there to help you and to answer any questions you may have. Don’t hesitate to ask.
Good luck with your party.
My love, thoughts and prayers are with you, Barbara and all the family.
Hugs, Joyce
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR BARBARA
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU
Hugs and prayers,
Joyce In North Carolina
Kathys Comments
Kathys Comments
Kathys Comments
Kathys Comments
I was trying to send you some birthday greetings from “Kathy’s Comments” but for some reason they did not take. I am not sure how to delete them.
I AM SORRY.
Hugs, Joyce
Happy Birth Day to a wonderful person.
God Bless You
Dear Kellye; I hope you had some reults today at the hospital regarding the drainage. This is important enough, but I thought you might have had more response on some ideas. Have you tried the internet? Birthday wishes coming your way. Just having family around to give support is the best birthday present you can give. From my experience when your loved one is tired, it is just too much to really put out the effort to entertain. It is enough to just breath and be cheerful, not to let others down. At this point sleep is the miracle worker, and the short lived moments of energy become less and less but more important as long as the people surrounding the patient are truly the close people that need to be there. I just lost a childhood friend, the brother of my best friend, this morning. I wasn’t able to visit him because it was just toop exhausting for him and I understood that he wanted to be remembered in a well state, not as he was. I am struggling today because my best friend is very stoic and in charge right now. I am going to visit her tomorrow, knowing she will want everything to be as usual and not make any emotional signs, or even cry with her. It will take all my might not to, because I know she wouldn’t like that, atleast not right now. It takes all her might to just do the right things and be organized. That is her way of dealing with her brother’s loss. She sheltered him from visitors, but probably at his request. I understand, because it takes all your might to just be here, knowing that you want to stay much longer than god is allowing. I hope I haven’t upset you by writing this. Sometimes I get too much for myself, so sorry if I have overstepped.
I hope you are coping and that your sister in law from Canada arrived in tact. Hopefully you are all surrounding each other with the love and support that families are designed to do.
Weezie